I feel as though this could be a very ramble blog post, and nothing like my normal writings, so I apologise in advance. I like to write down everything that is in my head, I find it very theraputic and I'm sure if you have a blog yourself you will completely agree. Most of the time I love talking about beauty because it is something that I am ridiculously passionate about and I could ramble on about all day. Although sometimes there's life stuff that simply overflows through my fingertips and makes its way here, and to be honest, I feel as though sharing these things is healthy. (Probably not but oh well.)
Recently I've been working a lot, and only having the odd day off in week means that spending your time wisely becomes much more of a bigger issue than when you had every single Saturday and Sunday off at school. At school it wasn't a big deal if you stayed in bed till 1pm (which I did both days) because to me it felt like school would never end and that I could do this every weekend and never feel guilty about it, and frankly I just loved sleep. But now I've got older, and every single day is my decision on how I spend it, I feel that there is a pressure to do something productive.
Most of the time on my days off all I actually want to do is stay in and just chill. Being at work all the time means that it is go, go, go 24/7 and its blooming tiring. And I know people have it a lot worse than me, but still, there's only so much one tiny 18 year old can take.
To me I don't see anything wrong with lounging in bed, watching films and eating your whole body weight in food. I also don't see anything wrong with getting fresh air and just walking around near where you live. I love having the choice of what I want to do with my days, but along with that comes the social pressure of people asking "So what have you been up to?" and you literally realising you have nothing interesting whatsoever to tell them.
In my family I have always been the laziest I am not even going to lie. My sister, a massive netball fanatic, in all the sports teams at school, head girl, a "go-getter", as I call her, is basically the opposite of me. I'm the person who was known as school as "her sister" and the one that the teachers always had high expectations for but were never quite happy with what I achieved. My mum, the daily runner, insomniac nurse with four children a dog a cat a husband and three fish. She's the mum that makes day updates on Facebook about what she's doing with comments after comments saying "I don't know how you manage to fit it all in!"
I'm the one who just loves photography, is obsessed with make-up and YouTube, and really just has no idea what she wants to do with her life a t a l l.
So working sometimes 9 days without a day off means that spending my time how I like to enjoy it becomes a massive deal for me. People may nag at me (*cough, cough* m o t h e r), but I am staying strong and insisting to spend my life as I please. Even though I will admit that it is not as productive as it should be. People do housework, do other jobs, and spend time with their friends and I just like cosying up with Tom watching stupid documentaries about land-slides. (Legit did that yesterday).
I'm not sure what message I'm trying to get across hear, I just want people to know that they can send their time however they want to. Without people telling them how to live their lives, and trying to change them into something that they're not. I have always felt like the shadow in the family that doesn't quite work the same as the others, but now I've realised that I simply do not care.
So I will leave you with a quote that I try and live by more and more each day. I hope this blog post was not absolute rubbish to read and you can relate even slightly. Please leave your thoughts below and I will see you again very soon!
Until Next Time,